Showing posts with label San Fransisco. Show all posts
Showing posts with label San Fransisco. Show all posts

Friday, February 19, 2010

Hot Bay Action


Saturday we have another screening of Bike Porn at the Roxie on 16th and Valencia, but before that we are taking in an art show of bike polo photographs at the SOAP Gallery around 28th and Mission, a mini polo tourny at 21st and Shotwell the winners of which will recieve free passes to the final SF show!

and then there is sunday...

Sunday February 21st
The Roll Up
4401 San Leandro St Oakland, CA 94601
9pm $8, 2 for $15, 21+
www.rollupbikeshop.com


On Monday we are supposed to have a show in Davis. It has been cancelled and rescheduled and then canceled and now we're not entirely sure what is going on.

On Tuesday we hope to have a screening in Santa Cruz

and on Thursday we have a show in Santa Barbara, which is really not in the bay.

Bringing it to the people...
Read more »

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Erotic Film Fests Abound!

Happy Fucking Valentines Day.

We mean that in a good way, that you might have some fucking sex. Good fucking sex at that. If not with someone else consider using the appropriate tool.

Good Vibrations in San Francisco is one of the largest, longest running and yet still respectable sex shops anywhere. They have great ethics and they are big fans of Bike Porn offering up great prizes to people who are willing to play our games.

Now they are offering up MONEY! fucking bling bling dolla dolla, make you holla holla cash green machine if ya know what i mean.

==========================================

CALLING ALL INDEPENDENT FILMMAKERS!

Submit your short erotic-themed film to Good Vibrations Independent Erotic Film Festival and you may end up a star! Whether you’re a professional artiste, art student, budding filmmaker, or just having fun with your Flipcam, we want to see your stuff! What’s erotic? You tell us! Funny, serious, gay, straight, if you think it’s hot, we want to see it in 7 minutes or less. Our 2010 Grand Prize Winner will receive $1,500 at the Castro Theatre in San Francisco on September 23rd! Submission deadline is June 30, 2010. Visit www.gv-ixff.org for official Rules and Regulations.

==========================================

Ok, so we're jealous. We want to be able to give away big prizes and wads... of dollar bills. We even have a plan for profit sharing for filmmakers! Well not so much a plan as a vision. But presently we dont have much, but if you are a struggling something-or-other uh, how you say... filmmaker, than you might consider doing something really great and getting paid.


If not our call for entries is even earlier: May 10th 2010. And we haven't even had the official internerd announcement yet. But just you wait, the artwork on this is the stuff coconut dream cream pies are made of.

Read more »

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Polo in the Bay



Hardcourt bike hockey started in the Pacific Northwest 7-8 years ago. Teams in Portland, Seattle and Vancouver have for much of that time been beating the crap out of each other for fun and bragging rights. A number of breweries have been able to make it though slow economic periods due to our patronage.

From the NW many a sojurn was made to the Bay in seach of similar hardcourt action. Typically the result was good, but not sustained. SF was perpetually the land of old school grass polo.

In 2007 SF hosted the NACCs and many bike punks got a taste of what bike polo can be. Epic games are still discussed in Portland ad nauseam.
Here we see the influence of NW polo.
Now at the end of 2008 both SF and Oakland have regular polo battles, this weekend there are a couple extra.

  • Thursday November 27 -
  • Oakland Polo Rockridge BART. Oakland's regular weekly game every Thursday night.
  • 8pm
----------------------
  • Saturday November 29
  • Lobot Gallery
  • Special edition INDOOR POLO
  • 10pm (after bike porn screening at 8pm)
----------------------
  • Sunday November 30
  • Ride SFO bike expo and polo at Cow Palace in SF.
  • Special edition INDOOR POLO
  • 3pm
----------------------
  • Monday December 1st
  • Every Monday night in the Mission come play
  • Dolores Park
  • Church and 18th
  • 7pm


We heartily encourage you to check http://bikepolo.ca for an international discussion of the game's finer points and blunts.
Read more »

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

who the fuck forgot to title this shit?

This Friday we ride in our first SF Critical Mass. It began in San Francisco years and 2 months ago, since then this simple monthly ride has given urban bikers around the world a chance to feel safe while riding. Being apart from auto traffic means breathing easy; being on a bike means looking good.
  • Black Friday, November 28th
  • Herman Plaza - Market @ Embarcadero
  • 6pm
Later that night we host 100s of sexy bikers, and the premiere of The Loaded Warrior trailer

A post apocalyptic world without gasoline is daunting…
But imagine a world where beer is scarce and only those with most brutal pedal powered machines can attain it…

Meanwhile we are still waiting for our alcohol stimulus package.

After critical mass, come see us at
Roxie Theater
Valencia and 16th
11pm

Thanks to the Bike Coalition, Laughing Squid, Cyclecide, Slouch Cycles


Keep us pumped as we roll up the coast
Read more »

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Arrest, Denied Constitutional Rights, Bored Gestapo

This is the story of our friend Lauren and her time in jail this New Years. I talked to her just after her release on the morning of Thursday, January 3, 2008.

Her crew of friends went to go play in the desert some 40 miles North of the California-Mexico border. After a few days camping they were traveling north, away from the border, heading back to Oakland when they were stopped by Homeland Security.

The Flower Shop Bus is not a corporate branded coach with business professionals in suits. The outside is a unique, colorful explosion of art and counterculture; a rolling bohemian transport.

"But we never crossed the border. We never left US soil, and you have no reason or right to detain us," they protested.

Standing outside the bus with their police dog Homeland Security was not deterred."If this dog is not let on board the bus we are going to have to pull everyone off."

The passengers were not willing to give up their constitutionally protected rights. "We do not consent to a search," they said.

So the guards walked the dog around the outside of the bus. At some point the dog handler interpreted the dog's actions as a sign. "We have probable cause now. Everyone off the bus"

The passengers complied with the orders. "Funny thing," one of the passengers said. "Once they had decided they had probable cause to search the bus they did not bother to take the dog on board. They just started throwing things around."

The passengers were not trustful of the guards. "can we watch you search our bus?" They asked.

"You can observe from outside the bus." the guards said. Then just moments later all the passengers were told to go inside the holding cell at the Homeland Security station.

The Homeland Security guards searched everyone. They took everything other than one piece of ID and cash money. The passengers were then locked in little gray rooms. One with 6 guys. Another with 6 girls. Their accommodation included:
  • a toilet without seat
  • a water bottle
  • graham crackers and gas station burritos (enough food for one person shared between 6)

They were repeatedly told that they were not being held or detained. (Once a person is detained that person gains certain protections and rights, including being told why they are being detained. If the officer cannot tell you why you are being held you are free to go.)

To avoid letting their spirits dampen they played games like hurricane and farticane and tried to communicate with the other holding cell.

Eventually the guards brought everyone to a room with a table on which sat a pile of drugs: marijuana and mushrooms.

After a long moment they asked who was responsible for these drugs. Everyone was confused then, quickly, the passengers all became very irritated. They had just spent half a week in the desert. By the time they left their makeshift campsite they had almost nothing left. No paint for art, no food for eating, and certainly no drugs.

"Hey! Who's been holding out?!?"

It was explained to them that although there was no way to prove ownership they would all be charged with possession, trafficking and the like. They would not detained, nor held, but they would not be able to leave. Or, if they cooperated, and the owner took responsibility everyone else would go free.

After some discussion about their options it was decided that the driver would take the fall: misdemeanor possession of marijuana, and felony possession of mushrooms. Also a French girl who had overstayed her visa is in the process of being deported. Presently she is being held in San Diego.

Quipping about the drug war and the incredible waste of resources it creates, one anonymous passenger said, "I think they should go out and pluck all the plants that are illegal."

"It is rather ironic. Here are travelers on a lonely road... Here is a federal agency that I pay to keep me safe..."

Shawn was able to get Lauren a flight so that she could reconnect with the Bike Pornification Tour. She got off the plane onto the BART and caught the last half of the 2nd show in San Francisco.

Lovers of pornography beware! Our borders shrink every day and our rights diminish even faster. Persecution for behaving or appearing different is tantamount to enforcing a homogenized, milquetoast culture of xenophobia.

Wear protection, carry lube and be ready to defend your sovereignty .
Read more »

Out of the Living Room on to the Streets

What ho! Davis has all the infrastructure to make any city jealous (except some form of mass transit that connects with an elevator that takes one to the top of a hill in an old growth forest just outside an urban center... but other than that its great!)

The thing is they are suffering from a lack of culture to draw the like minded folks together. Last night viewers of The Pornography of the Bicycle came one step closer to an active bicycle culture.

30 people crammed themselves into a modest living room in the N St Cohousing. This was the first time we had a public screening in a private residence. It was a little different to be sure. In a big theater anonymity is very possible, even likely, and hecklers (totally encouraged) are unknown voices clamoring for more. But in a small space everyone knows who said what.

The big advantage was being able to take 15 min after the show to answer questions. So many questions. "Why did you do that?" "How do you normally ride on your saddle?" Does that hurt?"

The audience generously donated $75 to our humpalicious efforts. And then a motley crew consisting of a recumbent tricycle, a tallbike, a single speed, a pedal-electric hybrid 2 seater, and the mobile bike church trike rode off on those mean Davis streets.

Thanks guys, now go start up some bike polo league. I got a hankerin for some nice biker on biker violence.


TONIGHT! BIKE PORN @ THE ROXIE!
@ 7 and 9:30 pm
with gifts from Last Gasp and Good Vibrations
Read more »

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Bring Porn Home

Tonight, Jan 2nd we are having the 1st ever public screening of The Pornography of the Bicycle in a private residence.

Our friend Pasture Ted has arranged for a nice spacious domicile at 732 N Street in the Platinum Bike City of Davis, CA. I'm looking forward to seeing 1st hand how much better it is than biking in Portland. I hear their cops still give out lights to bikers without them, so maybe i will get lucky.

Regardless this is a unique opportunity to experience these programs in a very intimate setting. Maybe I will talk for a bit afterward, or maybe I will get run out of town.

Thursday, January 3rd we screen our bike porn in San Francisco at the Roxie. Everyone's eyes light up when i say that so the theater must be pretty good.

We also got some sweet gifts from our friends at Good Vibrations. A book on masturbation a couple cockrings and more!

I want to thank Cyclecide for hosting the best NYE party I've been to in a while. Good people, good performances and no cover! I love me some free fun!
Read more »

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Countdown to Calipornification


I have abandoned my Portland bike mecca to take up arms (and legs) in the heart of car culture. Los Angeles! A fierce combination of cyclists are assisting me with the Bike Calipornification Tour.

We are hitting all the biggest, baddest, cycle-horniest places south of Portland on this tour: LA, SF, and CG*

One of the most exciting part for me is getting to meet some of the people who submitted videos. Both Paul de Carcass of the SFVISBF and Colin Arlen of Macaframa who co produced the San Francisco Track Bike video will get to see the entire program for the first time.

We are very thankful for our supporters who remind us that our bodies and our bikes need lots of love.

A variety of sponsors is helping to make this evening even more special... that is to say there is some cool stuff you might get just for showing up:


  • A display of too sexy bicycles, Merry Saddles is strutting its stuff.
  • One of the longest running, women operated sex stores in the country Good Vibrations is helping us shake it up in San Francisco.
  • Ashira of Red Riding Hood Productions has some hats.
  • Liz and Shay of C.I.C.L.E. are providing tshirts
  • Babeland has recently opened a new store in LA and is pulling out all the stops!

UPDATE: OH CRAP! I ALMOST FORGOT

  • Orange 20 bikes will support the cause with some of their fine wares
  • Jen Diamond has stepped up to provide one of her handmade Jerseys

screenings in Santa Cruz? Dubious. In Davis, CA? Likely! Bike Porn Radio interview New Years Day @ 5:15 PM with Pastor Ted.

*CG... as in Cottage Grove, Oregon. Duh.

Read more »

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

the big three down south: LA, SF and CG*

After 3 months and 100s of emails (really... hundreds of emails) we finally secured a venue in San Francisco.

The Roxie will host 2 screenings of bike porn on Thursday, January 3rd, 2008

This is in addition to the LA screening @ the Vine Theater on Friday, December 28th and the screening at Centro on January 5th in Cottage Grove, Oregon .

Finally we will see if Baghdad by the Bay can handle our Little Beirut filth.

*Little did you realize that Cottage Grove is a mecca for kickass perverts, but that's why you read this right?
Read more »

Thursday, October 11, 2007

California, we are coming for you!



Who Put the Porn in California?

You did!
Just like with Ed McMahon's sweepstakes you may already be a winner of bike porn at a theater near you.

At the moment our offices are working overtime to schedule a California tour of The Pornography of the Bicycle. Do you know venue that should to host it?

Ask yourself these questions:
  • Do you envision yourself flying down a hill, carving up scenery?
  • Do you feel attacked by others due to your "perverted" biking behavior?
  • Do you yearn to hold a smooth, tapered steel seat tube?
  • Do you wake up with a hole in your heart the size of a bottom bracket?

Than you are an ideal candidate to help make Bike Porn a reality in California.

The tour spans 2 weeks from approx December 23rd to Jan 6th

Do you have what it takes? email our offices today!

revphil [at] gmail [dawt] com

If you are still not convinced try watching our trailer for the last Bike Porn Tour
Read more »

Friday, October 5, 2007

Enjoy Calipornication

It appears that once again, this holiday season Shawn and I will find ourselves traversing the majesty that is California. Of course, this time we wont be showing Bike Love2: Outta PDX.

The dates are a little fuzzy still, but I believe that we will drive (eep!) straight down to LA, then take our time coming back to Portland screening it along the way... kinda like stopping to hump the flowers.

You could help bring Bike Porn to your home! Contact me and tell me you are a dirty Californian (or Southern Oregon) biker in need of release.

meanwhile enjoy some almost not quite porn that is not at all bike related but is on theme, kinda.

Read more »